Living a Life of Significance

Did you take time to reflect on your habits, your routines, and how you can get back to having an increased level of energy each day? Which ONE of the suggestions did you decide to focus on for the next 30 days?  I hope you don’t settle and accept the “no energy” as the norm.  We ARE in control and there ARE things we can do.

It’s been a very special time taking in all the beautiful thoughts and reflections from the kids this past Mother’s Day. Each of us tries to do the best we can at the time, but it’s nice to hear that I did have an impact, on some level, as to who they are today as young adults and parents themselves. I am so very proud to be their mother.

The heartfelt words and celebrations on Facebook about all the mothers were so uplifting and heartfelt. It was not taken for granted that I was able to call my mom once again this year. At 88, she is doing very well, and I feel blessed to still have her in my life, my children’s lives, and my grandchildren’s lives!

This brings me to the topic for this week’s blog. My latest reading is John Maxwell’s book Intentional Living; Choosing a Life That Matters. We each have our own story whatever that is, and deep down don’t we all want our life to matter? Don’t we each want to make a difference while we’re on this earth? John references one of my favorite movies It’s a Wonderful Life. Remember George Bailey? He was always choosing to do what he believed was right for others. There comes a point in the movie where George experiences a crisis and begins to believe that everyone would be better off without him. Unlike the rest of us, George is able to view his town and others’ lives as though he never existed. During this time, he began to realize that he had made a positive impact each time he took action to do what he knew was right and each time he helped others. His life did matter.

Living a life that matters, living a life of significance is what I hope we all strive to accomplish. I know during the time when I was a new mother I didn’t know very much, I didn’t have my mom around to help guide me, and I often times was going purely on doing what I thought was going to help this young baby grow up to be healthy and happy. Fortunately, I did have a wonderful neighbor and colleague who was there as a support system and encourager. In addition, being a teacher, I was learning things about discipline in the classroom that could transfer to being a parent. Thank you, Foster Cline and Jim Fey with your Discipline with Love and Logic philosophy.

Yes, it did help to be a teacher, but when it’s your own children it’s not quite as easy. I did know, early on, that my role was to be a parent NOT a friend. My role was to have boundaries, give opportunities to make choices, encourage, support, and give chances to try new things etc. I told many parents that their job was not to be their child’s friend that if they did their job as a parent when their children were growing up then they would be their child’s best friend when they were grown.

In the book, John Maxwell says “Don’t let the word significance intimidate you. Don’t let it stop you from pursuing a life that matters. When I talk about significance, I’m not talking about being famous. I’m not talking about getting rich. I’m not talking about being a huge celebrity or winning a Nobel Prize or becoming president of the United States….To be significant, all you have to do is make a difference with others wherever you are, with whatever you have, day by day.

What’s the key to a life that matters? It’s living each day with intentionality. When you intentionally use your everyday life to bring positive change in the lives of others, you begin to live a life that matters.” One of the many things I love about John Maxwell’s books and his messages is that each of us can change. “If your story isn’t as meaningful or significant or compelling as you want it to be you can change it.”

The best stories are those that come from experiences. Those are the stories that are told from the heart; sometimes with tears, sometimes through mistakes and failures, sometimes with pure joy, sometimes through laughter etc. When you think about it, isn’t intentional living about living your very best story?

“If you want to live a life that matters, don’t start when you get good; start now so you become good.” We all start something new doing things wrong, making many mistakes but as long as we learn what’s wrong, make changes and try again we’re on the road to getting better. When baby #2 came along, I at least had a little better idea of what to expect. This time the learning came with the fact that raising baby girls is different than baby boys and each child is unique, special and with their own skills and talents. I knew that in the classroom, now I was learning it as a mother. As a parent, I was learning through actions. There were many decisions made on a daily basis from the time the kids were babies to their entry into elementary school. Of course, then there were those middle school years and before I knew it they were graduating from high school heading off to college. Looking back, they weren’t always the right things to do, but I was doing my best based on love.

In my 64 years, I didn’t have the term intentional living, but instinctively I knew that I did want to make a difference in my husband’s life, in my children’s lives, in the lives of my students, and in the people that I met. Being authentic, walking my talk, loving my husband and children through the fun times, the times of celebration but also loving them through the tough times, through the times of crisis those were even more important. This is my continuous journey of being the best me that I can be.

Over this Mother’s Day celebration, I hear words from my children that bring me to tears, things that I didn’t know they felt, and things they remember that I didn’t know mattered to them. PRICELESS. I know Amanda shared some of the things her daughter, Sophia, said about her that she didn’t know about herself. Sophia’s words reaffirmed she was a good mom despite her own uncertainty. The beautiful accolades people shared on FB about their precious mothers both living and those that have passed away confirm the fact that living an intentional life is possible and is a key to why we are on this earth.

Throughout our lives, we strive to be successful as a person, as a spouse/significant other, as a parent, in our careers, with our health, etc. etc. “Intentional living is the bridge between success and significance.”

“No one stumbles upon significance. We have to be intentional about making our lives matter. That calls for action ---and not excuses. It’s easier to go from failure to success than from excuses to success. Action is what converts human dreams into significance.”

According to John Maxwell, “When I die I cannot take with me what I have but I can live in others by what I gave.” That is what I want in my life. My husband, my children, and now my grandchildren are my reasons for doing all that I do. Living a life of significance!

I wish you a week to reflect on your intentions and your focus on being intentional in all that you do. This will begin to change your mindset and your actions reaching a level of significance.