Optimism Can Be a Game Changer

Optimism Can Be a Game Changer 

I hope you made time for reflection as a part of your week last week. It’s too easy to put time for ourselves on the back burner or even do something as simple as being grateful. My wish for you is that 2016 will be different than 2015.  The only way that will happen, however, is if you make a commitment to change.

After two funerals in the past 10 days, it brings me to a very humble place. Sammy, the 23 year old double heart transplant and our 69 year old friend from the Holstein Association who passed away suddenly from a rare pion disease were both people of influence. Their services were times of celebration though sadness was obviously evident. I found it interesting to hear so many stories of how both Sammy and Bill, in their own way, celebrated their families and friends. They both were people who made a difference in other people’s lives by their attitude and walking their talk. Though a great age difference between the two, I find it interesting that age has nothing to do with attitude. Both Sammy and Bill had their own disappointments and personal challenges, however, both chose the path of being upbeat and positive as well as simultaneously living a life of integrity and humility.

I came across two powerful quotes recently. I shared this one on my FB page:

“The mind is a powerful force.

It can enslave us or empower us.

It can plunge us into the depths of misery

   Or take us to the heights of ecstasy.

Learn to use the power wisely.”

Thanks to Chris Misko for sending this out:

“Protect yourself and limit the time you spend with “still people”

Still complaining,

Still hating,

Still pointing fingers at others, and

Still going nowhere.

Powerful words, don’t you think? What is it that pushes some people to a life of gratitude despite challenges and even dysfunctional childhoods? What is it that pushes them on despite the road blocks and closed doors? What is it about those who had no positive role models growing up to not use that as an excuse of why they are the way they are? Instead, they focus on why they can, and why they refuse to perpetuate the cycle of dysfunction.

Are we born with that mindset of positive, half-full mentality? Is it learned? I don’t know the answer to that question. My personal opinion, however, is God doesn’t create junk. God puts people and situations in our paths to help us see the good, the positive, and the blessings. It’s our choice whether we “see” these people and/or experiences. Some people would argue that being positive in negative and toxic situations and environments is denying reality. Hmmm…maybe so, but I would challenge back with the question, “So how is that negative and toxic mindset working for you?”  Is it changing your life? Is it helping you move forward? I would venture to say, “Probably NOT.”

I’m not talking about the times we’re sad, occasionally challenged by people and situations, or occasionally struggling in our job, with a spouse, our children etc. The key word is occasionally. We ALL have those situations since it’s a part of life. What I’m specifically referring to are the negative and toxic people, situations etc. that are ongoing.

I recently read an article I believe was from Maria Schriever. In parts of the article she states, “Optimism is an underestimated, powerful handy tool that can be pulled out of your pocket whenever you feel vulnerable to a certain situation or perhaps feel like something uncomfortable or distressing happened or is happening. It is a master key needed to open a lot of life’s doors that cannot be opened otherwise.”  She goes on to say that, “Learning to stay positive in unpleasing situations is priceless and adds value to your lifestyle. It is your CHOICE to be positive or negative when it comes to various situations.”

I can hear several of you saying, “So that’s all well and good, but you don’t know all the @#$@ I’m dealing with.” That is probably true, however, once again I would ask, “How is that working out for you?” The continual blame, pointing fingers, and using your dysfunctional home growing up as an excuse only perpetuates the negative. One solution to avoid “falling prey” to negativity is to look for solutions, for the root of the problem rather than thinking about the problem and blaming the cause of the problem.

Focusing on the problem itself will only drain your energy and keep you from looking forward to a better world, better work environment, better lifestyle, a better marriage, a better relationship with your family. When you think solution, your mind may be diverted to something more positive; the thought of coming out of that dark hole that seems impossible to climb out of right now.

What does all this mean? First and foremost, the mind is a powerful force. Choice is always a part of mindset, optimism is a game changer, and CHANGE is part of the equation. Funny how these words of mindset, choice, and change are constantly reoccurring. If you aren’t willing to believe that things can be different and you’re not willing to change, then to be blunt, you’re stuck.

If, however, you’re willing to take action to make a difference in your life here are a few suggestions:

One, create a support group or have a few people who know you well, they will “tell it like it is” to you, yet will also help you through unpleasant and difficult situations. This group needs to be a “positive” group and people who will be your advocate. These are people who can ask questions and help you think along a different line. Often times, we’re too close to the situation.

Two, train your mind!!  If you find yourself questioning your abilities, your commitment, who you are because of the negative comments others will say about you, and you find you are beating yourself up quite often, STOP and regroup. “Whether it’s tension and stress at work, bills, disappointments, a marriage that’s failing, or children with special needs etc. negativity is something present in life and is very hard to remove. Training your mind is a valuable exercise to better your life. STOP beating yourself up and make sure you feed yourself with positive thoughts. You may need to get professional help or find a professional group that has an expertise in the area of your difficulty. These are a only a few ways to train your mind.

Three, accept change. Haven’t you heard the saying, “The only constant in life is change?” People who use the excuse, “I am who I am, so you have to accept me for that,” are unwilling to change. If we surround ourselves with positive people, if we train our minds to think, learn, and grow then we realize we don’t want to be around people who are not changing who are not willing to do something different. I think of my life and thank goodness I’m different than when I was a teenager, or in college, or even in my 50’s. Life demands for us to be different in order to adjust to where we are in life. It’s different when you’re single then married, married with no children to married with children, etc.

Four, seek help.  Are you someone that is afraid or embarrassed to admit to the fact that you need help? Or have you been pushed to the point that you realize you need to accept help in order to get to a better place. Someone else’s experience, expertise or training may be a way to help move on. At times, we need someone to lend us a piece of their experience, and how they dealt with certain situations in an attempt to look at the alternatives that we wouldn’t have thought of on our own.

Remember we all have our good and bad moments in life and that you are not alone in this world. The above four ideas only touch the surface of what you can do. If you are willing to value yourself, train your mind to believe in yourself, you’re willing to accept help from others who are positive and supportive, and you’re willing to look at alternatives that will mean change THEN and ONLY THEN can your life be different .It’s your choice.

I wish you a week of looking at the power of your thinking, your mindset, and which voice you are listening to – the positive or the negative?

Sammy's Celebration

Sammy’s Celebration

Did you take time last week reflecting on your many blessings? I hope that was a priority for you, and I hope you will continue to spend time each and every day reflecting on the blessings and gratitude that occur each day.

Last Saturday, Jon and I attended “A Service in Celebration of Samantha Remington.” I wrote about Sammy in last week’s blog, and I feel a need to share this experience of celebration. I don’t know how you do this when your heart is so heavy, but it was THE most beautiful celebration I think I have ever attended. From Barry to Brigitte to each of the siblings, they shared their daughter, their sister through videos, song, and prayer to a packed room. 

There was a touching written story, “Samantha and the Angel” written by “Papa” Paul Benedetti which I could only read through tears. He began, “At the first spark of life, the Angel came for Samantha and the spark dimmed and nearly died, but her heart pulsed – “not yet” – and was heard and Samantha lived.  He continued with his story of Sammy’s life and the times when the Angel watching over her decided “not yet”….His conclusion read, “But even heroes and the strongest warriors must fall when time runs out. The Angel laid gentle hands on Samantha, and she slipped away to dwell in peace in the lands where we will join her. Until then she is alive and in our hearts and her love will endure and sustain and nurture us all our days.”

As all of us were wrapped into this beautiful fold of love, support, humor, tenacity, faith, and yet also sadness, each member of the Remington family had not only written Sammy a personal letter, but they also each read their letter out loud. Barry read his letter to his daughter and then he read a “letter from Sammy.” 

This young 23 year old woman has touched so many lives whether it be family and friends or the doctors and nurses or the American Heart Association, or organ donors etc., She lived a life of being present, a life of smiles and gratitude, and a life watching over others. She is now an Angel watching over all those she loved. Sammy has made a difference in this world through her positive attitude despite her pain and frustrations, she lived a life of purpose and determination, and she blessed so many in her short time on earth.

Thank you, Remington family, for all you have each taught us about family, love, inner strength, and faith by sharing this painful time with all of us.

I wish all of you a week of reflection. Reflection about your purpose on this earth, reflection about your attitude whether it be positive or not, reflection about your relationships with your spouse, children, family, and even in the work place. I wish you a daily dose of reflection and gratitude!

   

Touched By An Angel

Last week I wished you a week to focus on what you needed to do to turn the negative in your life into something positive. How did that work for you? What strategies did you use? What actions did you take? The key take away for me was I needed to surround myself with positive whether it be people, music, what was on TV, and/or what I was reading. In addition, I had to get my mindset right. I found I was focusing on my negative interpretations of things going on rather than blocking out the negative and refocusing on my gratitude and the positive. That’s easier said than done, however, so next week’s blog will deal with more specifics.

I can’t dwell on my challenges as they seem so inconsequential to what others are facing. Our friends the Remingtons faced the death of their 23 year old daughter, Sammy, last Friday.

Jon and I first followed Barry, Sammy’s dad, when he played football at CU. Since that time, he married a beautiful woman, Brigitte, and they began to raise their family.In a wonderful video, Touched By an Angel - Samantha Remington, which you can find on YouTube, Sammy’s first 18 years are documented. The touching video shares the story of Sammy from her birth 23 years ago to her second heart transplant. As you watch and listen to Brigitte and Barry sharing their emotions about their first born child. They were told she had a “heart murmur,” was in the hospital for a month and then were told their baby girl needed a heart transplant. The video follows their journey, as parents, along with their daughter’s life journey. In the video, Sammy shared that “because of her parents she was able to live a normal life, she was happy, she was always smiling, and she felt her life was a gift.”

The video also allows us to listen to the other three Remington children explain their love for their older sister. “She was always watching out for the others and had such a loving spirit.” Once again, her smile was mentioned as something special. Sammy, herself, explains that she always was smiling.

In her junior year in high school, Sammy wasn’t feeling well and after taking a final exam she told her mom she thought they needed to go to the hospital as her heart was racing. That was then the turning point of needing her second heart transplant. Another match was found and after many months of recovery, Sammy was back on track to finish high school and go on to college.

Sammy and her family all exemplify the meaning of giving back and living life to its fullest despite all the challenges physically, emotionally, and financially. A foundation was established http://www.sammyangelheart.com/ to help not only Sammy but other transplant recipients.

The Samantha Remington Angel Heart Foundation has been established to provide help and support to Samantha and other transplant families with their medical debts and other counseling and support.  Organ transplantation is a very costly procedure with both before and after hospitalization, lifetime treatment and expensive medication. These costs can easily overwhelm even the most financially secure family.

The members of The Samantha Remington Angel Heart Foundation know and understand that Samantha will continue to deal with her ongoing health problems with the bravery and resiliency emblematic of her life.  Without the miracle of organ donation and the skill and dedication of doctors, nurses, and other health care professionals, no one would have ever known our beautiful Samantha.  This foundation is dedicated to assisting Sam and others like her fight the good fight.  All proceeds will go to payment of the medical expenses of these heroes.

If you go to the site today, you will read Brigitte and Barry’s emotional announcement of Sammy’s passing. What a horrible thing to lose your child, I can’t even imagine. However, what I also know about the Remington family, their friends, and other champions they surround themselves with, they will continue to make a difference in other’s lives in Sammy’s memory.

One thing we can all do is consider signing up to be an organ donor. If you are one already, congratulations! If not, you can learn more at http://organdonor.gov/index.html.  Sammy was able to live a life for 23 years because of people who made a commitment to be an organ donor.

Thank you for reading this. I want to close with a quote Sammy’s sister, Carly, wrote on Facebook,

 “It is with a shattered heart that I say goodbye to my sister Sammy. She was the happiest warrior anyone could have met. Battling two heart transplants and countless illnesses Sammy always had a smile on. She was an angel on Earth, always worrying about other people before even thinking of herself. She was my older sister, best friend, protector, and now my guardian angel. I love you Sammy. ❣

My heartfelt sympathy goes out to the Remington family and those touched by the loss of this beautiful soul.

I wish you a week of reflection on your many blessings.

What Do Taylor Swift and Von Miller Have in Common?

I hope you took time this week to access your personal heart health. Did you look at your lab reports and check on YOUR numbers? Though February is Heart Health month, EVERY month is important for your heart health.

From 26 year old super star Taylor Swift, to 10 year old Egypt Ufele an up and coming fashion designer, to 26 year old Super Bowl MVP Von Miller the message is the same! Be true to yourself, don’t let anyone take away your dreams, and you can change the negative to the positive!

Isn’t that the essence of our life’s journey? We have to know who we are as an individual. We have to be clear about our dreams, goals, passions, and what we want out of life. When negative things happen, we are in control of not giving up but changing the negative to a positive.

Taylor Swift used her acceptance speech at the Grammy’s to issue an empowerment statement: “ What I want to say to all young women is that there are going to be people along the way who will try to undercut your success, or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame, but if you just focus on the work and you don’t let those people side track you some day when you get where you are going you’ll look around you and you will know it was you and the people who love you who put you there and that will be the greatest feeling in the world.”

The above comment was directed to the conflict Taylor has had with Kanye West, but what a powerful message for all of us to absorb. Swift is also the song writer, singer, and performer who crossed over from country to the mainstream with tremendous success but not without its own challenges.

Egypt Ufele, is a 10 year old who was often times bullied for her size. Her story was shared on the Today Show Wednesday the 17^th. The bullying continued repeatedly and was often because of her body size. There was name calling, and she was even stabbed with a pencil at one point. Instead of shrinking to the negative, she found a way to turn what was a negative into a positive. She created her own line of clothing which includes plus size outfits for children as well as adults. She is THE ONLY child designer dressing runway fashion models. “She fought back with her creativity and her grandmother’s sewing machine. She traded bullying for a business when she launched her own clothing line.” Her empowering message was, “I turned negative attention into positive attention.” That is all from a 10 year old!!  Amazing.

For those of you who follow Von Miller the MVP of the Super Bowl and the Bronco outside linebacker, it appears “on the surface” that this 5^th year linebacker and three time Pro Bowl selection “has it all.” After all, he was a standout at Texas A&M with 182 tackles (104 solo) and won the Butkus Award which recognizes the nation’s best linebacker. He was selected in the first round (2^nd overall) in the 2011 NFL draft.

But his path has not always been a cake walk. Miller was suspended while in college and then again his second year in the NFL for violating the league’s substance abuse policy. He was suspended for six games. Referring to his suspension, Miller stated, “I made mistakes and my suspension has hurt my team, Bronco fans and myself. I am especially sorry for the effect of my bad decisions on others.”

But this story is one of a man who took responsibility for his actions and turned his life around. After Super Bowl 50, when asked about playing with resilience and relentlessness he became quite emotional. “I’ve definitely had my struggles, and it was because of my teammates, my family, Mr. (John) Elway…(it’s) all these guys that never really quit on me and kept believing in me that got me to this moment where I am today.” He stated that his message was directed to Johnny Manziel who has had his own drug/alcohol issues.

What’s your take away from hearing these three stories? Whether a well-known and celebrated singer/song writer, an NFL football player and Super Bowl MVP, or a 10 year old runway fashion designer, they all have experienced road blocks and naysayers. What they have in common, however, was their desire to change the negative to the positive and to rise above the negative. They each had a desire to fulfill their dreams and desires. They each did NOT succumb to the challenges of those trying to steal their dreams. They did NOT succumb to bullies or drugs/alcohol, and they NEVER quit moving forward despite the road blocks.

What about you? What are you willing to do to fulfill your life’s journey of Being the Best YOU that YOU can Be? Are you taking the negative and turning it into a positive? Are you allowing the jealousy of a co-worker, friend, or family member, the power hungry boss, the lazy teammate, the negativity of a spouse to alter your vision for your life? OR are you like Taylor Swift, Egypt Ufele, or Von Miller who took control and turned the negative challenges into a positive outcome?

I wish you a week of focusing on what you need to do to turn the negative in your life into something positive.

February is Heart Health Month

I hope you had a week filled with inspiration and that you found time to create your own Life List in order to make each day a masterpiece. If that’s the case, take a minute to pat yourself on the back.  YOU just made yourself a priority in your life’s journey!

In addition, I hope you had a Valentine’s Day of your choosing. We don’t all have a special someone, however, we ALL have family and special friends. Spending a lot of money isn’t the point, however, a phone call, a note, or even a store bought card have a special meaning!

Not only is February Valentine’s Day, it is also Heart Health month. This week think about the following information personally, if you’re a woman, and if you’re a man you have females in your life so don’t discount this information.

Mayo Clinic states, “All women face the threat of heart disease.”  Did you know that more women than men die of heart disease each year?  “Heart disease is the number one killer of all women,” says former U.S. Surgeon General Richard Carmona, M.D. It can and it does affect young people, so it’s not just a problem for those of us who are older.  The good news is if we are aware, informed, and we take action, we can minimize our risks.

First and foremost, understand that the symptoms of a heart attack are different for women than men. We hear about men grabbing their chests and complaining of severe pain in the chest and arm area.  “The most common heart attack symptom in women is some type of pain, pressure, or discomfort in the chest.  It’s not always severe or even the most prominent symptom, however,” according the research with Mayo Clinic.  “Women are more likely to have heart attack symptoms unrelated to chest pain.  

Symptoms such as:

*neck, jaw, shoulder, upper back or abdominal discomfort

*shortness of breath

*right arm pain

*nausea or vomiting

*sweating

*lightheadedness or dizziness

*unusual fatigue

These symptoms can be more subtle than the idea of crushing chest pain.  Women described the pain as more pressure or tightness.  “This may be because women tend to have blockages not only in their main arteries but also in the smaller arteries that supply blood to the heart.”  I also found it interesting that the symptoms for women may occur more often while we’re resting, or even while we’re sleeping.  Mental stress can also be a trigger for heart attack symptoms.

“Women tend to show up in emergency rooms after heart damage has already occurred because their symptoms are not those typically associated with a heart attack, and because women may downplay their symptoms.  If you experience these symptoms or think you’re having a heart attack, call for emergency medical help immediately.”

Women of all ages should take heart disease seriously.  According to Lori Mosca, MD in an article for the AHA Journal, “Cardiovascular disease – the number ONE cause of death in the U.S. – claims the lives of almost 500,000 women each year.  Being aware of the risk of heart disease is important because it’s the first step in taking action to lower the risk.”  Being aware of personal risk and treatment options can empower women to live a long and healthy life.  “Awareness, knowledge, and action are by far the most important factors in saying goodbye to the No. 1 killer of women.”

I say all this with the intention that ALL of us wake up and take charge of what is going on in our bodies.  Heart disease needs to be more on the radar as a possibility for all of us, and we need to to pursue getting to the bottom of why we don’t feel right! We need to acknowledge that something is wrong.  Too often we use the excuse of menopause, or I’m too young to have heart issues, or this is just a phase because I’m going through a lot of stress at home or in my business etc.  Our excuses and rationale don’t acknowledge that we are not listening to our bodies and our bodies are not doing what we know is our personal normal.  All the information and awareness in the world will not do us any good until we take action and continue to push for answers.  We cannot afford to just “settle.”  Our life may depend on it.

Women of all ages should take heart disease seriously especially those with a family history.  That’s the first step.  Do you know your family history?  That means your biological parents, grandparents on both sides and maybe even great grandparents.  Does anyone in your family line have issues with high blood pressure, high cholesterol, stroke, are overweight, or have diabetes?   Are you yourself a smoker or are you around second hand smoke?  

Know your numbers!!  Blood pressure is optimal at less than 120/80.  Cholesterol levels are important.  Total cholesterol optimally should be less than 200; LD (bad cholesterol) less than 100 mg/dl; HDL (good cholesterol), more than 50 mg/dl; and triglycerides (a type of fat in the blood), less than 150 mg/dl.  (According to the AHA Journal) Healthy weight varies from person to person, but having a normal body mass index (BMI) is helpful.  A BMI of 25 or higher can be associated with an increased risk of heart disease.  Waist circumference is also a useful number to know.  It’s a tool to measure whether or not you’re overweight.  Women are overweight if their waist measurement is greater than 35 inches (89 cm).  These numbers are important at any age and should be monitored from year to year.  Subtle changes happen and often times we are suddenly aware that an extra 5 pounds + has crept on and now it’s an additional 20 pounds. Then there are those pounds we never lost after the birth of each baby.

So what is in our control?  Learning our family history and learning/monitoring our numbers are the first two critical components.  Then it’s looking at our spouse, significant other, our children, and other family members.  Are we willing to make a lifestyle change for ourselves that will impact those special people in our lives?  Are we willing to not make excuses or rationalize away our well-being? Are we willing to take action NOW and be consistent?  Lifestyle changes are our first line of defense against heart disease. 

Living a healthy lifestyle must be your top priority.  The following suggestions are rated as Class I which means they’re the strongest recommendations given by an expert panel through the American Heart Association:

1.     Stop smoking cigarettes and avoid secondhand tobacco smoke.

2.    Get at least 30 minutes of physical activity each day.  If you need to lose weight, exercising at least 60 minutes may be needed.

3.    Start a cardiac rehabilitation program if you’ve recently been hospitalized or had a procedure for heart disease.

4.    Eat a heart-healthy diet that includes fruits, vegetable grains, low-fat or nonfat dairy products, fish legumes, and sources of protein low in saturated fat (such as; poultry, lean meats, and plant sources). 

5.    To maintain a healthy weight, balance the calories you eat with the amount you use up each day. 

6.    If it applies, lose weight.  Losing even a small amount of weight can help lower your blood pressure and reduce your risk of diabetes. 

I can hear the excuses already…I don’t have time to work out, I can’t get my spouse/significant other or children to eat healthy foods, I’ve tried to quit smoking before and it just hasn’t worked, I’ve tried to lose weight before on ____ diet and it never worked or the weight never stayed off. 

Ok, are you done?  Now stand in front of a mirror and look at yourself.  Tell yourself that you’re not worth it, tell yourself you don’t deserve to be healthy, tell yourself the special people in your life won’t miss you when you’re gone.  Which is it?  You can’t have both. 

Make a choice to be the best YOU that you can be.  Start by living a healthy lifestyle that impacts YOU which will then impact all those special people in your life.  YOU CAN DO IT!  Take one small step at a time moving forward, take action, and be consistent with your thinking and your actions. 

February is heart health month.  Now take all this information into March and create a heart healthy life style from this day forward.

I wish you a week of awareness about your personal heart health.

Life List - Inspiration - Wisdom

Did you decide on your focus for February? 2016 IS going to be THE best year for you to work on being the Best You that YOU can Be!  In order for that to happen, however, action needs to be behind your hopes and dreams.

I was “taking in” some interesting perspectives this past week. First, I was listening to John Maxwell on the latest Success magazine CD. He referenced having a Bucket List but most important having a Life List. Second, also on that same CD, I listened to an interview with Tom Izzo interview where he talked about the difference between inspiration and motivation.  Finally, I reread John Wooden’s book, The Wisdom of Wooden – Mr. Century On and Off the Court. 

It struck me that the common theme coming from three very different individual perspectives was much the same. Jon Maxwell is a well-known author, motivational speaker, teacher, and mentor of adults around the world.Tom Izzo is a successful men’s basketball coach, teacher, mentor, and motivator of young men at Michigan State University. Finally, John Wooden, who passed away at age 100 in 2010, has “been hailed by many as the greatest coach in the history of American sports, but also as famous for his personal philosophy. If you have had children playing basketball, or other sports, you have probably seen the Pyramid of Success which is from John Wooden.

What are the common themes? I would suggest there are three: (1) be true to yourself, (2) inspiration comes from within, and (3) make each day count.

John Maxwell talks about a Bucket List which are all the things we want to do before we die. A Life List, however, guides our focus on what we do each and every day of our lives. John Wooden received a 3 X 5 note card from his father entitled, “7 Suggestions to Follow” which Wooden later came to call this gift the “7 Point Creed.” These guide his focus on a daily basis. Tom Izzo referenced needing daily inspiration – something that is personal, comes from within, and will last far longer.

We’ve all gone to a sporting event, a conference, taken a class, heard something on the radio/TV, read an article – all are motivational. For a period of time, we’re “in the moment,” excited, ready to “conquer the world,”  we’re ready to play the game of our lives, we’re anxious to get to the gym for that new body, we have a goal to cut out sugary drinks etc. etc. Motivation is exactly what we need to take the first step.

What happens, however, when the opposing team is bigger and stronger? Do we rely on the coach’s pregame motivational speech? Yes, to some extent, but we also have to rely on our own personal inspiration. Intrinsically, you begin to talk to yourself, “I know I had a great week of practice, I know what to do. I believe all my off season training will make a difference, I have been in watching film, taking the suggestions from my coaches etc. so YES, I CAN do this. INSPIRATION has now taken hold.

I was motivated to start saying 10 gratitudes each day by something I read from Jim Rohn, and now it’s a daily habit. It’s one of my Life List necessities; it’s one of the things on my list that help me make each day a masterpiece. INSPIRATION has now taken hold.

What motivated you in January to set a goal? Did it become a habit and now you’re excited by your results insuring that you’ll continue for another month? INSPIRATION has now taken hold.

What about that class on leadership? It was motivational to hear new ideas of how to handle conflicts at work. Now you find yourself in a challenging situation with a colleague and you pull on the resources and strategies you just learned. WOW! You experienced a positive result from the way you handled the conflict, and it worked for other situations as well.  INSPIRATION has now taken hold.

When you personalize your learning in the form of a Life List as John Maxwell suggests, or you experience learning turning from motivation to being internally inspired as suggested by Tom Izzo, or you have a 7 Point Creed as John Wooden describes, the key is YOU! YOU are taking control, YOU are taking action, and first and foremost YOU are making a difference in your own life.

“Greatness can be attained by each of us when we make our finest effort to become the best we are capable of becoming,” according to John Wooden. He continues, “God didn’t make us all equal in ability; we’re not equal as far as size or appearance. We don’t all have the same advantages as others, BUT we are all equal as far as having the same opportunity to make the most of what we have – whatever that may be. When you give yourself fully to that effort whatever your circumstances or situation – good bad, or otherwise – you have done all you can do.”

Jesse Owens said, “We all have dreams. But in order to make dreams come into reality, it takes an awful lot of determination, dedication, self-discipline and effort.” Now frame this with a Life List or a personal creed to guide you in creating your daily masterpiece. Inspiration comes from within!

I wish you a week filled with inspiration, and a time to create your own Life List in order to make each day a masterpiece. 

It's Time to Clean the Slate

 The first month of 2016 is now behind you. Last week I asked if you were living the pain of regret or the pain of discipline relative to your goal for the month and/or in other areas of your life. What’s your answer? Did you come up with a list of what you DO want in your life?

It’s now February. Hopefully, you have created one habit of change which you want to continue and now’s the time to have a second goal. What will you do for the month of February 2016? I, personally, plan to use this month for researching new skills on using the internet and social media in order to reach more people with information about Evolv and the HOPE movement. I’ll keep you posted.

Recently, I came across a wonderful video which tied in with my recent topic about regret. A large chalkboard was set up in the middle of New York City for an entire day. Written on the board was, “Write your biggest regrets.” It was amazing to watch the number of people who stopped and wrote something. The board was filled with comments such as; time wasted, not saying yes to things, not taking a risk and pursuing a dream, not applying to med school, not following artistic passion, etc. etc. 

http://www.trendhunter.com/trends/biggest-regret

Do you see a common theme? NOT! The key word was NOT. One man commented about time slipping away. It’s never too late to make changes in your life. Do you want 2016 to slip by and you are in the exact same place as you were in 2015? Maybe your goal this next month is to take the word NOT out of your vocabulary. Instead of NOT being a friend your goal now is BE a friend. Instead of NOT having time to plan weekly meals, it becomes PLAN weekly meals. Instead of NOT having time to exercise it becomes EXERCISE three days a week and walk two days. After all, it is a mindset. What we focus on expands according to Jim Rohn. Maybe your February goal is to NOT procrastinate making a decision about something important in your life. Instead you commit to doing whatever it takes to make a decision about something that’s important to you so you can move forward.

The words on the chalkboard in New York City are a microcosm of what we all think about as we move forward with our lives. They were about chances NOT taken, words NOT spoken, dreams NOT pursued. Do you focus on the past and all the NOT’s? Remember you can’t move forward if you’re looking in your rear view mirror. Instead, I would challenge you to do what they did in the video….ERASE the not’s!

Given an “eraser” you can create your own clean slate. Now instead of the NOT’s you can write possibilities. You can clean the slate and pursue those resurfaced dreams and goals. You can clean the slate and start eating healthy. You can clean the slate and forgive the people who have hurt you. You can clean the slate and get help/support with a troubling marriage. You can clean the slate by dealing with a long time conflict or make the decision to let it go. By cleaning the slate, we can now move forward.

EVERY day begins with a clean slate!  Wake up each morning with a word of gratitude that you have one more day on this earth to make a difference in your life and in the lives of those around you. DO the things you’ll regret NOT doing. When people who are on their death bed are asked if they have any regrets, most of the responses come down to things they did NOT do.

The goal for 2016 is to make our lives better than it was in 2015. In order to do that, we need to eliminate the excuses, blame, guilt ...the NOT'S and move into the realm of pursuing change.

It’s NEVER too late to make it happen! This could be your year of being the Best YOU that YOU can Be!

Decide on your February focus. This is your clean slate…

I wish you a week of reflection and time to prioritize what is really important in all areas of your life!