I'm Taking Back ME!

I hope you had a week of focusing on making a difference in a positive, respectful way in your own corner of the world. I also hope you were able to hold those around you, if necessary, to speaking with respect and without degrading others!

Happy Valentine’s Day.  This is a day that comes with a myriad of emotions depending on your personal situation.  We see in all the advertisements, TV ads, and promotions etc. happy couples.  We’re encouraged to spend money on chocolates, flowers or even jewelry (those are the top three items purchased), spend a romantic dinner with our loved one, and this day is one of the largest number of marriage proposal days after Christmas.  It can be a fun time for the kids when they exchange Valentines at school; they get Valentines from Mom and Dad, grandparents and others.  I must admit I get caught up with finding a special card for Jon and the grandkids. Of course there is also the baking of heart shaped cookies and cupcakes, eating those little heart-shaped candies with the messages written on them, besides other sugary goodies.  It can be a fun, love-filled time for so many.

There is another side of this holiday, however.  Are you having difficulty in your marriage/relationship?  Maybe you’re divorced.  Maybe you’re single and really wanting to be in a meaningful relationship.  This time can be agonizing.  Your child may be the one with a lot of friends and receives a lot of Valentines.  But what about that child who feels left out and doesn’t have a lot of friends?  No matter where we are in our lives young and old, we want to feel valued and loved by those around us.  I encourage you to think outside your own world and reach out during this Valentine season to include those who could use that special Valentine that you’re thinking of them.  Take action, look around, and seek out not only those who you would normally reach out to but those who could use something special. 

I was re-reading the Jon Gordon book, Energy Bus.  Perfect timing. I wasn’t very far in the book when I came across this, “Thoughts are magnetic. What we think about, we attract. What we think about expands and grows. What we put our attention and energy on starts to show up more in our life. AND the energy we project through our thoughts is the energy we receive.”

I know all that. I know that what I focus on expands, yet I have been guilty of getting caught up with all the toxic, negative events happening in our world today. I happened to pick up this book again for a reason. I needed a reminder.

More reminders…”We’re not talking about the fake kind of chest-thumping rah, rah positive energy that simply masks our negativity and annoys people. We’re talking about real positive energy that helps you overcome obstacles and challenges to create success. We’re talking about trust, faith, enthusiasm, purpose, joy, and happiness. We’re talking about positive energy to inspire and lead others.”  That’s powerful!

I think what I have personally been missing was allowing my positive “tank” to empty and the emptiness was filled with negativity. It has all been my fault. I was “feeding the wrong dog” and as Gordon says in the book, “it’s physically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time.”

As we all know, there will always be negativity everywhere. There will always be negative people and the negativity they represent. It’s been evident that negativity breeds self-doubt, fear, hopelessness, and negative energy that can totally drain you. Remember that disrespect and a lack of civility of other’s opinions, other’s belief system is a part of that negativity.

So what do we do? “Positive energy is like a muscle. The more you use it the stronger it gets. The stronger it gets the more powerful you will become. Repetition is the key and the more you focus on positive energy the more it becomes your natural state.” In other words, it’s practice! No surprise, right? Like anything you do that is not a habit; it takes consistent repetition for it to become a part of you.

What else is in our control? Be self-aware. In all areas of our lives, we are being manipulated to what others want us to believe – good, bad, and indifferent. Our newspapers, advertisements, TV news, TV shows, Facebook, Twitter etc. etc. If we are mindful of this manipulation then we can decide if what’s being said or written is something we believe, something we need to check into and learn more, or something that doesn’t fit with our own viewpoint. Why not question? Why not investigate the opposite stand for at least a comparison?

It's also in our control to make a conscious decision to eliminate the toxic people and environments as much as possible. That might include getting off social media for a period of time. After all, that IS in my control. Why would I subject myself to not being valued for who I am and my belief system? I only need God's love and guidance.

Too many of us try to please others which only make us unhappy. Too many go along with the crowd without knowing why. When YOU feel good YOU “give” from power. When you’re caught up in all the negativity and only feel good by pleasing others and/or going along with the crowd mentality, you will only give away your own “power” and happiness.

I am taking back my natural tendency to be a positive, grateful woman who feels very blessed in my life, and I refuse to be influenced by toxic negativity which includes a lack of respect and tolerance for differences.

I wish you a week of examining your own belief system in ALL areas of your life and be true to your own heart despite whether or not others support you.