STOP and REFLECT

First of all, I want to share that I took my own advice from a few weeks ago, as I needed a quiet space for my own thinking. Part of that time was to not write a blog for last week.

To be honest, I was feeling totally overwhelmed with sadness and frustration with so many things going on in this country and where we are headed. I was also questioning just why I write these blogs and if I’m making any impact on anyone’s life. (I was having my own pity party.)

I’m not about changing your political affiliation or your religious choice etc. I am all about wanting people to take the time to personally reflect and have personal answers deep within their own soul, deep within their own moral values.

Two weeks ago, I wished you a week of finding opportunities to ask questions, finding opportunities to teach people HOW to think versus telling people what to think – two totally different approaches. I also wished you a week of identifying whether you are part of groupthink in some area(s) of your life.

I’m always interested in what you learn. I did that exercise too. What I came up against was when I asked questions about why someone felt the way they did or held a certain position; they did not want to hear my questions. They did not want to have any type of discussion. What I was confronted with were others telling me how I should think and feel, challenging my opinion, questioning my decision, telling me to get my facts right, and there was no willingness to hear anything to the contrary. This didn’t happen once or even twice but several times.

My take away, right or wrong, is whether it’s politics, religion, race issues, economic issues, education etc. etc., we have gotten away from civil discourse. We have gotten away from an environment where we can learn what others have to say and actually have a conversation - even a heated yet respectful conversation.

Instead we’ve gotten into challenging others about their views, analyzing every minute detail, criticizing opposing views, and even berating the other person's opinion. There is even an Ivy League professor telling students not to enroll in his Global Warming class, if they didn’t believe Global Warming is real. Really?!

I’ve been through it before when I don’t have the same belief system as a family member, friend, or colleague. As I’ve shared before, my strengths are not being able to regurgitate facts or get into a debate. I am a reader. I do want to know various opinions; I do get totally frustrated with mainstream media, or some of the attacks on both Facebook and Twitter. I am “wired” for honest, true discussions where it’s ok to express feelings with the facts I have found. I find I can only do that with a few people now, however.

Groupthink rarely changes opinions or actions. Unless you and I are willing to openly listen, read, and be discerning about the information we’re hearing and reading, then we will fall prey to groupthink.

I think part of my sadness and frustration has come from the anger, hate, and intensity of what is happening in our world; the debates, the racial issues, and even how divided people are on the split of Angelina and Brad (really?) This past week, I did what I needed to do and that was to STOP.

I needed time to STOP and REFLECT. I needed time to distance myself from anything that was negative or destructive. That was harder to do than I thought.

What I came up with is that as the political campaign gears up for the last few weeks before the election, we are all going to be challenged to stay true to our personal beliefs and not be intimidated by others. I would suggest we all STOP the gossiping, STOP the blabbing, and STOP the hateful words on Facebook, Twitter and other social media venues when others have a different viewpoint.

Maria Schriever, who I admire but don’t always agree with, recently commented that we need to start reflecting on our own selves. “What are we personally doing to make this country a better one vs. hoping we’ll see something negative in the news about the opposition?”

She continues, “It’s easy to sit back in our ringside seats and pontificate. It’s easy to cheer as our “opponent” gets whipped. It’s easy to complain about our election choices. It’s easy to gossip about public people’s marriages. It’s easy to shake our fists as we watch what is going on in Charlotte and Tulsa.”

It’s much harder, MUCH HARDER, to STOP and REFLECT about “our own role in our communities, our cities, our country – what we ourselves are doing/saying/thinking/to IMPROVE things. It’s easy to sit on the sidelines. You feed your thoughts, opinions, with input from TV, radio, the internet, and social media.”

Have we become a nation of spectators? Are we really just lazy to take the time to find out if what is being presented really accurate?  Are we paying attention to how our thoughts, opinions, and views are being manipulated? (BOTH political parties)

“When we participate in these things we feel “involved.” It feels like we’re doing something”. But are we? NO! We’re NOT!  We’re NOT making a difference; we’re NOT making things better. This is the ultimate groupthink!

This past weekend, I followed Jason’s away football game on the internet. The game went back and forth up until at the 1:36 mark, Missouri Baptist Spartans went ahead, for the first time, with a field goal. They held the opposing team resulting in the first win of the season and the first road win EVER.

Later, we watched the celebration, on the internet, of these young men and the coaches. Two separate times; one on the field after the game and the other in the locker room,  we watched the football players  and coaches all huddled together, arm in arm, shoulder to shoulder, black and white together as one, heads bowed, as one of the players said an inspirational and heartfelt  prayer. POWERFUL!

Each step along this journey of building a new program, they continue to STOP and REFLECT on where they have come from and where they’re going.

Can we all take a play out of the playbook that this team exemplifies?  Hard work, learning and growing, not listening to the naysayers, trusting in those that have your best interest in mind, having each other’s back no matter what color, no matter what religion, coming together for the team (our country) to be better. They exemplify living life above the line despite the disrespect they receive from other teams. They are relentless in their efforts! This team is creating a culture #AccepttheChallenge.

I truly appreciate those of you who do read these blogs, and I truly appreciate ALL feedback. I believe that each and every one of us has a purpose on this earth. I believe we are each a special gift from God. I believe that our country and how it began has had problems and challenges, however,  I also believe, each of us can make a difference. We can each stand up when we see injustice. We can each allow a difference of opinion without fighting or name calling. We can each STOP and REFLECT about what is happening around us.

I wish you a week to take the time to STOP and REFLECT on something that you’re passionate about. Let’s do what the MBU football program is doing…Accept the Challenge! Move forward with relentless energy, focus, and mindful respect for others.