Last week I wished for you a quiet reflection
time of all that you’re grateful for before the holiday. I hope you made a conscious effort to, first and foremost, take the time
to be present and enjoy your spouse, significant other, your children, and friends. As I
talked about last week, it's so easy to get caught up with the "hoop
la" and forget what this season is really all about whether you celebrate
Hanukkah or Christmas. We could focus on all the tragedies in our world
today, or we can focus on what we do have control over and that's only
ourselves. What can I do each and every day to make a difference in my
own life and to make a difference in others' lives? After all, it is a mindset.
Christmas is only a few
days away now. Unfortunately, it seems we hear about so many more issues
of domestic violence, assaults, suicides, drunk-driving etc. taking place
during this time of year. Why is that? Yes, there are people
who aren't happy, are taking out their feelings of frustration
and inadequacy on family members or on themselves. This time of year seems
to exacerbate those stressors and challenges. I would speculate that
finances trigger many of these feelings both now and again when it comes time
to pay off all the credit card bills.
But what
else? Is it the reflection over the past year, and the realization
that once again another year has passed and nothing is really any
different? Is it a focus on all the things that didn't happen
and a poor pitiful me attitude? Is it “looking around” comparing
yourself to others that seem to “have it all together?” In your mind, they don't seem
to have any of the struggles that you have. Or is it something
else? Does any of this ring true for you?
I would suggest a couple
ideas to think about. One is that EVERYONE has struggles and challenges
of some kind. EVERYONE is dealing with some challenge whether it be
physical, emotional, financial, with their relationships, or
spiritual. Even those that look like they have THE perfect life have
some kind of struggle, but we each deal with those challenges and struggles in
our own personal way. The choice might be to ignore, or deny, or we
choose not to focus on the challenge itself but the lessons being learned along
the way. Some “suffer” in silence while others “wear their struggle on
their sleeve” and let everyone around them
know they're suffering. A second thought is if the same
feelings are constantly reoccurring then why haven’t you done anything about
them? Is it easier to wallow in misery and discomfort blaming
everyone but yourself, than it is to take action and make changes?
Make this holiday season
different than ever before. Give gifts from your heart that you can
afford, make a conscious effort to let go of a nit picking, exasperated mindset
when with a difficult relative even if it’s your own spouse, parent, in-law,
or sibling. Let go of the judgment, criticism, and perfect
expectations. Come away, this season, with a feeling of
resolve. Maybe it’s watching the behavior of someone else and making
the commitment to never be that way yourself, maybe it’s looking at
being grateful for whatever little things you can find, maybe it’s realizing
that if you can be loving and compassionate, you get far more of the same in
return. Maybe the difference is to let go of that perfect Christmas
card picture, sit back, and just enjoy.
We will be spending
Christmas with our daughter and her family, and New Years with our son and his
family. I plan to take in each moment fully.
I wish for you a special
holiday time that includes: reflection, quiet moments, and gratitude.
No comments:
Post a Comment