TIME is Precious

TIME. We all have 24 hours in a day. Time is THE most precious commodity we have each day. AND time can also be THE most frustrating and stressful part of our lives.

This is the time of year where school is almost out, all the end-of-the year activities pile up, there are graduations to prepare for, some summer sports are starting with a new set of juggling demands, and this may also be a busy time at work on top of everything else. Yet, when we think about it, is there really any slower time? There always seems to be something.

I remember my principal would often reference the spinning of the plates on a stick seen at the circus as a visual of all the demands we each have “on our plate.” Doesn’t it feel that way at times? One plate is the job, there’s a plate for each child, our spouse/relationship is another plate, church demands, physical needs eg working out, the house, the yard, special events eg birthdays/weddings, maintaining the house, meals, grocery shopping, laundry etc. etc. etc. Whew! I’m tired already.

Picture each of the above “plates’ spinning and you running between the plates trying to keep them all spinning. Isn’t that what it feels like sometimes? And then we wonder why we start to have some of the plates crash. We’re frustrated that we can’t get everything done that we need to get done. We may even get so overwhelmed that we shut down.

How can some people seem to get so much more done in a day than others? I would propose there are some common characteristics with those people. They are usually disciplined with their time, they pre-plan and prepare in advance, they keep not only a calendar but put things on the calendar when they need to DO something, they are more realistic on what they can reasonably get done, things are organized in their home/office, and they seem to also be able to break down tasks into smaller pieces.

I can hear some of you right now with all your reasons and excuses. “I’ve never been organized. I work long hours and have 2, 3+ kids. I’m just not a planner. My mom/dad was never organized so I don’t know how to be either. I’ve tried before, but I’ve never been successful.”

If you like your life always being on reaction mode, always doing things last minute, forgetting events, looking around and seeing all that needs to be done and giving up before you’ve even started to deal with it then maybe these ideas aren’t for you and you can stop reading now.

If you want to begin making some changes, first and foremost understand this is a process, and it’s all about changing habits which does take time and consistency. If possible, find someone who is willing to help you that already has accomplished what you want to accomplish. It’s much more fun to have someone helping you and giving you ideas and suggestions as you begin.

Look around and decide what is THE top priority for you right now. It could be getting your house, garage, office (name your space) organized so that you can find things, and everything has a place making it easier to find things. That can be a HUGE top priority in and of itself. That means then you must break this down into smaller parts and take one area at a time.

Take the approach of…I CAN do this! It will feel fantastic when I see results! My Mindset is I CAN do this. Commit to making changes in your life and your family’s life. If you have a family, involve them in your efforts. Keep them informed about what some of the changes are going to be and involve their help when appropriate.

Set a start date and a date when you want to have something completed. This is critical! Hold yourself accountable. Purchase or gather together, ahead of time, anything you need to get started. It could be something as simple as having four bags or boxes: one for recycling, one for trash, one for keep/organize further, one for donations. Set yourself up for success from the very beginning.

A few thoughts as you begin:

1.    Make your start and ending time reasonable. You want to be successful. Smaller projects such as setting up a filing system for your bills may only take a couple hours. A larger project may mean committing to a couple days or a couple hours each week for a month. Be realistic without procrastinating.

2.    Prioritize what’s the most important area(s) that will make a difference for you and your family or you and your colleagues.

3.    Depending on the project, be sure to have all the supplies needed to accomplish the project BEFORE you start.

4.    Take one step at a time and celebrate when something is accomplished!

You will find, as you move forward, that you are gaining more quality time in your day. You have more time for the fun things you want to do. You will realize how much time has been wasted, in the past, just trying to find things or how stressful life has been due to a lack of things being organized.

I look forward to hearing your project and how you’re proceeding. I’ve been fortunate to have several mentors and am willing to pass along ideas if you need help. Message me at maketraveleasy@gmail.com and we can talk further.

Book Title: Attitude is Everything by Jeff Keller

Quote: “For every minute spent in organizing, an hour is earned.”  Benjamin Franklin

The Precious PRESENT

Do you know people who always seem to be happy? Who always seem to have it altogether? Do you know people who leave you feeling good about yourself? What is it that sets them apart from others?

There’s a wonderful book called The Precious Present by Spencer Johnson that I’d encourage you to read NOW! It’s a quick read – maybe 15 minutes – but the message is powerful and can be life changing!

“Only YOU have the power to make you happy. The PRECIOUS PRESENT is called that because it’s the best present of all – it’s a gift that only YOU can give yourself.”

How often do you find yourself regretting things from your past? How many times do you find yourself wishing things were different? How many times do you find yourself projecting into the future a negative because you’re thinking about the past and projecting it into the future to happen again? We ALL do that.

“The present is just that…THE PRESENT! It’s NOT the Past; it’s NOT the Future, but it’s the PRECIOUS PRESENT!

“…the PRESENT moment is always precious. It’s not because it’s absolutely flawless, which it often seems not to be. But because it’s absolutely everything it’s meant to be…at that moment.”

We can spend our time lamenting about all the moments we missed, or why it has taken us so long to figure out something relatively simple, or how much happiness we have lost along the way. That’s the Past. It’s not happening now!

It doesn’t matter if we figure out what living in the PRESENT feels like if we’re young or old. What’s important is that we figure it out and put that mindset into action.

We all tend to think about what went wrong in many moments. We don’t experience what each special moment and place had to offer. We’re either too busy to notice or our mind seems to only focus on what is wrong or what is different than what we think should happen.

We can beat ourselves up with all we have missed, OR we can be observant to see what we’re doing to ourselves. We can get trapped in our guilt about our Past. In the book The Power of Being Thankful, there’s a wonderful entry on April 1^st:

“Satan remembers every tiny thing we have ever done wrong and will do his best to remind us of those things every chance he gets….No person is without making mistakes, and we all feel guilt at times, but when we keep that guilt long after we have been forgiven, it turns into shame….We need to understand and be thankful that God forgives completely – not partially, or almost, but completely! The goodness of God is greater than any bad thing we have ever or could ever do.”

“It is wise for me to think about the Past, and to Learn from my Past. But it is NOT wise for me to be IN the Past. For that is how I Lose myself.”

“It is also wise to think about the Future and to Prepare for my Future. But it is NOT wise for me be IN the Future. For that, too is how I LOSE myself.”

“And when I LOSE myself, I LOSE what is most precious to me.” Only the PRESENT nourishes us.

Those people we enjoy being around the most are the ones that are totally PRESENT when we’re with them. We “feel” their total presence through their eyes, by their questions, by their listening. We “feel” we are THE most important person in their life at that moment. They are fully PRESENT.

“When I feel guilty over my imperfect Past or I am anxious over my uncertain Future, I do NOT live in the PRESENT. Then, I experience pain. I make myself ill. I am unhappy. My Past was the PRESENT. And my Future will be the PRESENT. The PRESENT moment is the only reality I ever experience.”

The PRESENT is what it is. It is PRECIOUS. Even if I don’t know why. It is already just the way it is supposed to be. When I see the PRESENT, accept the PRESENT, and experience the PRESENT, I am well, and I am Happy.

I wish you understanding of how to seek the learning and growing that is our life’s journey and to create a mindset of being in the PRECIOUS PRESENT.

Book Suggestion: The Precious Present by Spencer Johnson

Quote: With God’s help, I’m going to live in the PRESENT, not in the past or in the future. Only YOU have the power to make you happy.

NEVER QUIT!

I want to share a story of an amazing young woman who is the epitome of someone with a never give up attitude. She also happens to be my niece! Jess has dealt with dyslexia most of her life and was given a medical diagnosis to that fact around the age of 12. Despite this challenge, this didn’t stop her from not only graduating from a private Christian High School, without educational support, but also went on to graduate from KSU. That’s a great accomplishment yet not even half of her story.

After college, Jess went on to work for Kansas Senator Moran in DC for a couple years before deciding to change the direction of her life. She returned to Wichita with a new goal in mind.  She wanted to go to med school to become a doctor. To begin that new journey, she first had to go back to college as she did not have the science courses needed to even be able to apply to med school.

For the next three years, she lived at home and went on to take chemistry and physics classes, calculus and who knows what else. During this time, Jess learned her strengths in how to study when it came to numbers and formulas. She was getting A’s in her classes, she was mentoring some of the younger students, and she graduated with another college degree!!

During her time at Wichita State, she was given a variety of opportunities to be on panels, she worked part time for a doctor, as well as in a clinic and continued to gain first hand experience in addition to all the classroom work.

Now it’s time to study for the MCAT’s. Jess studied 8-10 hours a day for months, met with study groups, and did whatever she could do to be ready for the tests. She took the test and had to wait for over a month to get the results. Unfortunately, her scores were too low to even be able to apply to any med school.

Ok, now what? Jess decided she needed to take a a biochem class that had been on the test, but she had not had the class. Now, enrolling in another class at Wichita State was necessary with the goal to retake the MCAT test. More money, more time, more studying.

Second time taking the test…she didn’t pass. Despite all the blocks in the road, despite the time, money, and frustration, Jess took time to rethink her path but NOT her ultimate goal of going to med school.

There were many suggestions and talks with family about needing accommodations when taking the test. She had to humble herself and ask for help. That, in itself, was a process. First, Jess had to spend more money to be re-tested by a doctor to prove that she did have dyslexia. (It turned out it was the same doctor who tested her when she was 12.) As we know, dyslexia is not something you outgrow. Her scores were almost the same as the first time.

Now to submit the results to those in charge of the MCAT’s. They could decide, despite any doctor’s recommendation, to not make any accommodations or they could decide on a variation of time allotments. It was their decision. They would let Jess know but there was no time line as to when that would be. Wait! Wait! Wait! Keep studying, keep studying, keep studying!

Good News! Jess was given 50% more time which was her medical doctor’s recommendation. Now she could take the four tests with additional time. Great news. It wasn’t that she didn’t know the material, it was all about her ability to read all the material and then be able to respond. Now, it’s time to take the MCAT’s for the 3^rd time!! Another year and a half has passed by.

Fast forward to the results from the 3^rd time. Yes, the scores were better, but she was still on the edge of getting into a medical school. More money…send out applications to medical schools and WAIT. She ended up with two schools giving her an interview. That’s a step forward. There was some thinking of Plan B like going to nursing school, but the dream was still in her heart.

One rejection and one “we’ve put you on the wait list”. WAIT. Keep praying, keep busy, and see what God has in store. At this point, Jess is almost 30 years old, she’s working, doing some traveling, and decided to take a Pharmacology class that was of interest and might be helpful.

Think about this. Almost 8 years after graduation from KSU and two years of working, a dream was determined to be her truth. More school, more money needed, more focus and time, more tests, more, more, more…even before you can begin to apply to medical schools.

Would you have quit by now? Would you have given up on your dreams? Would you have listened to the naysayers who said this must not be what God wanted you to do…look for something else. Would you have spent more time coming up with excuses…blaming the fact that you have dyslexia so that’s why you didn’t succeed?

NOT JESS! It’s my opinion that she was tested many times for a reason. She will be an incredible doctor with a heart and passion for helping others. She is a WINNER!

Two days ago, she was called from the school in Auburn offering her a spot in their newest class which reports July 15^th! Dr. Jess Adams! Sounds fantastic to me.

“Pray that God will strengthen you during your waiting period. Pray that you will have the grace to wait with a thankful attitude.”

“God’s timing is perfect, we can trust Him in the waiting period.”

We can all learn from this almost 30-year-old who had a dream that was not to be denied. She is a role model for me, and I’m blessed she is my niece!

“When people try something, but are unsuccessful, one of the primary reasons they give up is that they feel like ‘a failure.’ The truth is we are never a failure unless we give up. Failure is like fuel for greater determination and success in the future.”

CONGRATULATIONS, Jess! Your new journey is about to begin. Love you!

BOOK SUGGESTION: Extreme Ownership – How U.S. Navy Seals Lead and Win by Jacko Willink and Leif Babin

Quote: Never give up, for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn. Harriet Beecher Stowe

All I Need to Know

This week I needed to take a step back and remember the messages we all learned when we were children. Here’s a poem from the book All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten by Robert Fulghum as part of that reminder:

Most of what I really need

To know about how to live

And what to do and how to be

I learned in kindergarten.

Wisdom was not at the top

Of the graduate school mountain,

But there in the sand pile at Sunday school.

These are the things I learned:

Share everything

Play fair.

Don’t hit people.

Put things back where you found them.

Clean up your mess.

Don’t take things that aren’t yours.

Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody.

Wash your hands before you eat.

Flush.

Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.

Live a balanced life –

Learn some and think some

And draw and paint and sing and dance

And play and work every day some.

Take a nap every afternoon.

When you go into the world,

Watch out for traffic,

Hold hands and stick together.

Be aware of wonder.

It’s so easy to get caught up in the life of being an adult especially an adult with a spouse with children. We have those driving needs to provide for our family, to move ahead in our careers etc. which leaves little time for personal time and reflection. The above poem is a reminder.

After our incredible family vacation at DisneyWorld, I wrote down some of my memories, so I wouldn’t forget that special time. Re-reading them today reminded me why I wrote them down in the first place and gave me a quiet time to reflect on God and all my blessings.

It’s the little things. It’s being present and paying attention. It’s watching through the eyes of our children/grandchildren. Here are a few of my examples:

*Zane’s pure enjoyment during the 3D shows trying to catch things.

*Bria and I having our hula hoop contest in Hollywood Studios which ended in a tie.

*Being surprised with a gift of a Fast Pass for 5 by a Disney employee which Bria later gave to a family of 5 to enjoy since we were not going to be able to use the Fast Pass.

*Nyelle’s face looking up at the princesses during the Princess Breakfast.

*Teagan being totally in awe watching the finale at Magic Kingdom with all the fireworks. She had to be sure to see the top part of the castle because it was the most magical. She was mesmerized.

*Kyan’s cheerful demeanor, unless he was hungry, his flexibility to sleep in the stroller, and his pure enjoyment watching all the colors, the rides…EVERYTHING!

*Ethan’s proud moment of helping Kyan eat and bonding with the littlest of the cousins.

*Sophia, despite being 12 and much older than her cousins, was helping out, holding hands, and having fun.

*Michelle giving basketball tips to the waiter at the Ohana restaurant.

*Elsa surprising us all with a beautiful design, front and back, of a t-shirt we would all cherish long after the trip was over.

*Garet, Rob, and Jason breaking down the strollers in record time to be sure we could get on the bus easily.

*Jodi being the master of the Disney app; checking our wait times and directing us in the right direction.

*Jon speaking Norwegian to all the people in Norway (in Epcot.)

*Amanda making sure we all had our sunscreen on.

*Sophia getting to go back to the park at night with just her mom and Uncle Jason to ride some bigger rides and go through the Haunted House.

*Teagan and Nyelle laughing when Pluto signed their autograph books on his nose.

*Bria and Zane pressing pennies and putting them into their book.

*Ethan helping push Kyan’s stroller.

*Going on Splash Mountain where Nyelle’s job was to keep me from being scared, and I was to keep the water out of her eyes. We were both successful.

*The many pictures with the entire family, pictures of each family, and pictures with Jon.

*The beauty of our surroundings, the laughter of each grandchild, the upbeat and positive attitudes of all the park people.

*The pleases and thank you’s of each grandchild! PRICELESS!

“Hold hands and stick together. Be aware of wonder.”

Book Suggestion: Rings of Truth by Jim Britt

Quote: “We all have different gifts and talents, different likes and dislikes, different goals in life – these things make us unique, and we should be grateful for them. Love respects those differences.”

“I am thankful, Father, that You created us all uniquely.”

How Do YOU Handle Adversity?

How do you handle adversity? In a recent reading, the author made a claim that reaching one’s potential is linked to the way you handle adversity. Interesting.

“Adversity isn’t always bad. Actually, adversity can be something to be thankful for as (God) may be using it to strengthen you.” Winston Churchill said, “Difficulties mastered are opportunities won.”

“If you allow difficulties and challenges to frustrate, intimidate or discourage you, you will never overcome them. But if you face them head-on and press through the adversities you encounter, refusing to give up in the midst of them and moving forward with a heart of gratitude (there’s that word gratitude again), you will develop the skills and determination needed to be everything you were created to be and experience everything God intends for you.

How often are the things you think are difficult or a challenge directly related to your mindset? If things don’t go your way do you feel intimidated? Do you need to always be in control and don’t handle disagreements or different points of view well? What are your reactions when things just aren’t going your way?

I do think our reactions to adversity have a lot to do with our experiences growing up. I also think our reactions have a lot to do with how old we are which means how much experience we’ve had on life’s journey. What if we took the attitude that all adversity, when mastered, becomes an opportunity as quoted by Churchill? How different would your life look? Instead of adversities being a negative, what if your mindset was one of opportunity?

When the disappointment of not making a specific sport team, or not making the high school choir, or not making the debate team, or not getting on the Dean’s List, not getting the job, the raise the promotion you thought you deserved or not…. whatever it might be, what if we looked for the lesson? What if we looked for what is next? What if we learned something so the next time we were more prepared? What if we came away understanding more what we needed to do to reach that goal? What if we were open to a new path other than the one we had planned? Hmmm…

Gratitude and mindset have so much to do with what we want to accomplish in our lives. For me, life is a constant testing of our personal resolve, our personal dreams, and goals, and our personal desire to be the best we can be. We will always be tested over and over and over again. How do you handle those challenges, those adversities? Do you learn and grow? Or do you blame, complain, and defend your actions never taking responsibility?

Success in life comes from taking responsibility, learning, growing, and a never give up mindset. Success in life comes from remembering the quote from Winston Churchill, “Difficulties mastered are opportunities won.”

Book Suggestion: The Power of Being Thankful by Joyce Meyer

Quote: Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome.
—Booker T. Washington

What's YOUR Focus?

You get what you expect. What you focus on is what you get. Jim Rohn and others talk about this all the time.

You’ve heard the expression, “Go looking for trouble and that’s what you’ll find.” It’s true not only about trouble but about everything. “Go looking for conflict, and you’ll find it. Go looking for people to take advantage of you, and they generally will.” On the other hand, “Go looking for the best in people, and you’ll be amazed at how much talent, ingenuity, empathy and goodwill you’ll find. Ultimately, the world treats you the way you expect to be treated.”

People won’t take advantage of you because you won’t expect them to. It’s what you focus on! Look for the positive and focus on all that is right instead of what is wrong. It’s easier to get caught up in all the negative, go along with the complaining, listen to and accept the fears others are throwing out. Yet, where will that lead you? How will you be able to move forward with that negativity?

The most valuable gift you have to offer is yourself. Are you going to offer your friends, family, colleagues etc. words of encouragement and hope? Are you willing to find your own truth and facts OR are you going to go along with the crowd? Are you willing to learn, grow, and find gratitude in all that you have OR are you going to fall into the easy trap of fear, negativity, and complaining?

Motivational leaders such as Jim Rohn, John Maxwell, and even Robert Kiyosaki will tell you that you are who you surround yourself with. If you surround yourself with negative, glass half empty and critical of everything and everyone then that’s who you will become. On the other hand, if you surround yourself with people who are about giving to others, who are about adding value to others, who are grateful even for the little things then that’s what you become.

What do you choose? What will you focus on? After all, it is a choice and it is in your control.

Book Suggestion: The Go-Giver by Bob Burg and John David Mann

Quote: “Sometimes it’s better to be kind than to be right. We do not always need an intelligent mind that speaks, just a patient heart that listens.”

The Power of Reflection

Hello my dear friends. It has now been about seven weeks since I wrote last. As I stated on January 10^th, I’ve been using this time for a deeper reflection into my goals and plan of action to make 2018 THE best year yet. I have gone back and reviewed my own thinking over the past two years with many ah ha moments, many celebrations, and also many areas to continue working on with more focus.

Thanks to Byron Schrag, a mentor of ours in our business, challenged many of us to establish a new and consistent routine that included: (1) beginning the day with a list of gratitudes, (2) write out on 3X5 cards affirmations, (3) read something from the Bible, and (4) read for 30 minutes in a personal development book. In addition, I added reading the daily entry from a book called The Power of Being Thankful by Joyce Meyer and writing down my thoughts in a notebook when there was something I needed to get down on paper. That was not a daily activity only when I felt a need to write and reflect.

To hold myself accountable, I made up a chart listing each action and then the date. This started on January 8^th and I’m still going. I found that I have gone every day since the beginning with each of the actions listed above except for reading the 30 minutes each day. I missed two days without reading and there were 3 days of reading only 15 minutes. As with most things, habits come around the 21-day mark, and I must admit that I now look forward to this quiet time each day. It’s usually the time after working out, eating breakfast, and getting ready for the day. Sometimes it’s later because of a morning commitment. What’s interesting is that I find myself making sure that these all get done each day even if it means staying up a little later.

During this time, there have been far more days with positive thoughts and actions and much fewer days of questioning my purpose. I think that’s because my mindset is stronger and with Byron’s encouragement and support. I have been able to keep my emotions more level with fewer roller coaster times. My mindset has become stronger, I think, because of the daily activities I have set up on a consistent basis.

There are a couple entries in the Power of Being Thankful book which I read every day beside the daily entry. Here are a few I want to share; you can decide if they have any meaning for you:

January 14^th “If we are impatient, the situations we encounter in life will certainly cause us to react emotionally…Getting upset will not make this go any faster, so I might as well enjoy the wait.”

January 21^st “It is very important to focus on the right things…Whatever we focus on becomes magnified in our minds…Instead of meditating on our problems, we would be wise to meditate on God’s word.”

January 23^rd “Everyone needs a blessing. We all need to be encouraged, edified, complimented, and appreciated. And you have the ability to bless others. Be thankful that God not only blesses you, but that He has made YOU a blessing. We all get weary at times and need other people to let us know that we are valuable and appreciated…Remember, everyone needs a blessing—even the successful people who appear to have everything. When you live to meet needs and encourage those around you, you will find ‘joy unspeakable’ in the process.”

Feb. 9^th “We all fight battles and face the temptation to stop fighting and just give up, but commitment is the thing that enables us to resist that temptation…When you fiercely commit to God’s purpose for your life, you will begin to experience all that He has for you.”

There are several others, however, you can get a flavor for what this daily reading has done to contribute to a more consistent and positive mindset.

With our country and even our world in such a challenging time, this short respite has given me a chance to reassess where I want to put my time, energy, and focus. I think one of my main purposes on this earth is to learn, grow, and expand myself in order for me to make a difference in other people’s lives. Each day I ask myself, “What can I do to add value to someone today?” and “What can I do to make myself more valuable today?” At the end of the day before going to bed, I have a time of gratitude for things that day, and I answer those two questions.

I plan to continue to write my blogs once again at least twice a month. If you are still wanting to be a part of this email list, you will not need to do anything. If you are not wanting to receive them, there is an unsubscribe link.

My focus with each blog is to: (1) share personal stories and reflections which you will hopefully find at least one or two nuggets to apply to your own life, (2) have a positive mindset of encouragement, and (3) at times challenge you.

Book Suggestion: The Image by Chris Widener

Quote: “Capacity is a state of mind. How much we can do depends on how much we think we can do. When you really believe you can do more, your mind thinks creatively and shows you the way.”

I wish you time for your own reflection.